Ticking Timebomb
If I dreaded coming to work last week, this week I feel nothing. Well ‘nothing’ is a bit of an understatement, more like apathetic. I’m done and over with with this company. The lack of professionalism is disappointing as well as the lack of direction.
I am worried, I have to be honest about that. Perhaps if I was back in Manila I’d have quit already but the truth is, there’s so much more than just a shitty job. There’s rent to worry about and payment installments and debt and everyday expenses. I can’t afford not to have a job – that’s what it comes down to anyway – and it’s fucking killing me inside.
If I get laid off/shitcanned/fired/let go, I just hope that when that time comes I’d be ready. Ready, in the sense that I have a place to go to, a new job to try and love or hate, a new position to fill in, anything and anywhere but here.
I’ve given up this act. I’ve run out of patience. I’m at the end of my line. I can no longer understand what and why I’m doing this. I’ve stopped caring and I think it’s for the better.
I wish that I would have the guts to tell the bosses if one of these days they’d call me in for a “talk”. I’d like to give them my views on how much of a stink they are. I wish I would have enough energy to blurt out all my frustrations and make them see the wrong in their ways. But when you’re old and blinded by profits, there is no friendship or camaraderie or, at the very least, professionalism, that would make you change for the better. You can never teach an old dog new tricks, right?
Someday I’ll get some payback. I believe enough about karma to know that these bosses of mine are going to get bitten in the ass real bad. I just hope I could see it when it happens and laugh maniacally. But…whatever.
I hope they rot in fucking HELL!!!!!!!!!!
